Racism exist, it’s embedded in the fabric of this
country on every side. Some people choose to hate black people, and some people
choose to hate white people, and some people choose to hate other races,
whether out loud, or behind closed doors.
These people will always exist, and no movement, no
idea, no call for change is going to stop a racist from being a racist. Its
history is older than anyone on this planet, and it affects every single continent
on this Earth. Yes, racism exist everywhere.
When our young children go to school, or the
playground, do you think they pick their friends based on the color of their
skin? Do you think they care where they live, or what background they come
from? They don’t. They see another little human. They see a person. They pick
their friends based upon simple things, like whether they play the same games,
or like the same toys.
Our beautiful, innocent children…are colorblind.
They don’t separate people into categories, or
stereotypes until we as parents and loved ones force them too. We plant that
seed, the moment they want to invite their friend to their birthday party, or
have them over for a play date and we don’t allow it. Knowing nothing about the
child or his/her family, we don’t allow it, because of stereotypes and
assumptions. We create the questions in their head, and we make them wonder
why.
We plant the seed, when we are riding in the car with them, and comment on a part of town, as we pass it, or blame the color of someone's skin for the way they are driving. We plant the seed when we turn on the news with them in the room, and comment about what we see. Every word out of our mouth, everything we say and do, they are watching, and they are learning, and they will mimic.
This goes far beyond race, and deeper into
stereotyping in general. The majority of us have been victims, just as a great
many of us have been guilty of doing it. My son was once refused a play date
with a friend because he comes from a divorced home. Literally when my son’s
mother called to ask if they could schedule one, the other mother told her
“Your son comes from a broken home and we don’t want our son to think that’s
okay.” 60% of all marriages end in divorce in this country today. Is that my
sons fault? No. So should he be stereotyped and shunned because of it? No.
Guess what? It IS okay. You know what else is okay?
Everything else, about every other child out there that isn’t yours. Children
are children, completely oblivious to their parent’s point of view or beliefs,
until we allow those views and beliefs to enter their minds. Have we ever considered that
if maybe we allowed our children to go, or allowed their friend to come, that
both children might gain a positive experience from it? Have we considered that maybe they would learn something
good, instead of something bad?
Stereotyping can’t end, until we stop passing it along
to our children. Until we stop stereotyping in their presence, until we
stop watching the news with them in the room, until we stop filtering out
invites to those who might be different than us, to our child’s birthday. Until
we make these changes, this problem will continue to plaque our nation.
For some if not most of us, our parents did the same
things. For some of us, this plays a part in why we as adults, feel the way we do today.
Must we follow the path of negativity paved by the generations that came before us? Must we continue a negative cycle so out dated, in today's incredibly diverse society?
We don’t have to…we choose too. The beautiful thing is
that just as we have the choice to pass it on to our children, we have the
choice to break the cycle as well. We should make that choice.
Imagine if one parent, chose to break from the mold
and made that phone call, and invited that friend from a different part of town to their child's birthday party. What if not only that child came, but his/her parents came as well? What do you think would happen?
It’s safe to assume nothing. It's likely everything would go well and everyone would
have fun, and you know what would happen? Not only have two separate families
been brought together, by this simple act of inclusion, but it might just
impact other families as well.
Maybe, another family in attendance, who was
considering leaving their child’s friend off the guest
list, for a ridiculously stereotypical reason, will include them now. They should’ve in the beginning, but sometimes you
need to be a witness of a change in others, to see the need to change within
yourself.
Too many of us do it, white, black, or whatever color
we are. There are too many of us in this country who allow our own issues with
stereotyping others, to be projected onto our children. There are too many of us, who isolate ourselves and our children into stereotypical categories, because it's what's comfortable. We stay comfortably nestled inside our own little comfort zones, because that's where we will safe. Well unfortunately change isn't safe.
Change doesn't happen inside that little bubble that is our comfort zone. The only way to see change, and to create change is to face that fear, and to step outside of your comfort zone. The only way to make a difference is to break down our own personal walls of what we've been taught to believe is normal, and choose to create a new normal. We didn’t create this problem,
but we keep it going. Let the cycle be broken with us.
Maybe we should start by not focusing so much on getting other
adults to change their opinions, because that’s unlikely. The older we get, the
more resistant we are to changing the way we think. Maybe we should focus our attention more on
teaching our children about tolerance and acceptance. Maybe we should spend
less time having a war among ourselves as adults, and focus on the ones that
are watching us, and learning from our actions. Our children...the future of our
nation.
Our children watch everything we do, and will take
with them everything they learn from us. Is there a better reason on Earth to
change our behavior than our children?
We worry constantly about the world our
children are growing up in. We wonder what state it will be in, when they are our
age. How we choose to act now, will determine that. The world we create for
them today, the ideologies we teach them, and the things they witness, will
determine who they will be tomorrow.
Do we want to save our nation? Then let’s teach our
children, not to judge or stereotype a person by anything other than the soul and the spirit
they possess. Teach them to be open minded and accepting of everyone regardless of stereotypes.
Allow
them to be colorblind, and in doing so, the possibility exist that we might
over time become colorblind as well. To create change, we must be the change
within ourselves, and project that change out onto others. It is time to be the difference, so our kids can see the change.